tuesday 1 april'08

Not a good day either.... since yesterday my eyes hurts, my heart hurts and my mood hurts... whole day today was like putting a smiling mask on... and pretend im okie le so they won't be so worry about me... i dont want them to worry about me too much as i am a grown man i think i can handle this relationship problem.... so how to handle some might ask well stick to her and NEVER GIVE UP! Show her that i can do it, prove to her that i can take it... Admit to her that i can go through this thick and thin with her together as a couple....

no matter how many times she rejects me i will still wont give up... i wont surrender till i am dead... I know and Jiahe knows that she really have feelings for me, so with this feelings i must really push myself to the max show my maximum love i can give... She is a good ger, we can just talk about anything, she is really my type of wife im looking for. I know she have illness i dont mind no1 is prefect. God dont create prefect human being, unless he/she is Noah or Adam or Eve then i nothing to say. She told me she got heart failure ok, but for this reason she don't want to be with me... that's bull shit..... >:'[ We together go through this matter, since now medical is so advace there sure hav ways to cure it. heart transplant is one of them, i dont believe there isnt any other ways to cure...

In the mean time i can take care of her, I can provide things to her within my reach. Problems we can share and think of a ways to solve together. i dont want her to carry this heavy load, i wan to carry her load or carry it together.

I want to purpose to her as my wife...as 拿婚姻樘做走前提... I want her to have a happy meaning full life so she can live on....

Why is it that my love life is so hard to handle? I almost reach to the breaking down point le where I can just like that ends here don't care about those who cares....